“Oh,bleep no. "Jack! What are you-"He lit both wicks and grabbed one of the bottles. Grinning maniacally at me, he turned and hurled his bottle. It spun lazily,a trail of light until it disappeared behind the deck of the ship.Maybe it wouldn't work.Maybe-A massive fireball billowed up, scorching the air and flowering along the boat."Evie?You might want to throw that thing."I looked down in horror at my own burning Molotov cocktail,then flung it as far from myself as I could. It smashed against the side of the boat, most of the falmes falling down into the silver water.Which proceeded to catch fire."Wow.Didn't expect that!" Jack nodded appreciatively as the flames spread, eating their way outward along the top of the lake.The boat,now engulfed, creaked and groanded its death cries. "Adding a touch of faerie liguor to the petrol gave it the extra kick,I think."An unearthly shriek ripped through the air, jarring me to the bones.I did not want to meet the owner of that voice.Jack laughed,taking my trembling hand. "This is the part where we run.”

“Jack put his hands on his hips, surveying the scene with a satisfied nod. "That turned out much better than I'd hoped.""Please,let's leave!""What's your hurry? Let's take a moment to bask in the satisfaction of a job well done.""I didn't want to do that!""No?" He cocked his head and raised his eyebrows. "I thought you hated the fey.""I do,but that doesn't mean I want to run around the Faerie Realms lighting everything on fire!""What's the point in hating something if you aren't proactive?" He put his arm around my shoulders, steering me to look at the inferno with him. "You can't tell me that's not satisfying, not after what you saw.Faeries care about very few things,but they're quite fond of their little trinkets. That boat was a particular favorite of hers,not to mention the entire lake. All the centuries she spent crafting this landscape,then poof! One excellently thrown firebomb, and you've made her feel anger and pain more deeply than she's probably ever known. And far less than she deserves to know.”

“Jack waved cheerfully, got a running start,and did several roundoffs down the length of the hall.I turned to Raquel."i think he's broken."She heaved a don't I know it sigh. "Jack's past isn't one that contributes to stability.But he's a good boy."He nearly got me disembowled by my gym teacher.Good boy he was not.”

“Bleeping faeries," I muttered darkly. Why couldn't they leave me alone?Uber-vamp's eyes lit up. "Faeries? Do you know where I can find one?"I rolled my eyes. "Trust me,if I could, I'd set you loose on the whole race.”

“And..it was Jack. Jack. Of the many things I'd considered doing to him, most involved violence.None of them involved lip-on-lip action.I jerked my head back,but it wasn't hard to get away,since he pulled back at the same moment.He wrinkled his nose. "Well, that was...interesting. Always wanted to try it,but now that I have,I'm pretty sure I never want to again."Furious,I smacked him in the shoulder with my free hand, hating that we still had to have one clasped so I wouldn't be lost forever. "You"-smack-"little"-smack-"freak!"-smack. "What was that?!" SMACK.He dodged another volley. "And I had been under the impression that afterward was a little less"-he winced as I connected hard-"painful.""Listen,creep,if I wanted you to kiss me,I would have asked! And I didn't. And I wouldn't! And if you ever try that again,so help me,I will find that fossegrim and throw you to a watery death!"And then-as if his awkward,terrible kiss weren't bad enough-he started laughing."SHUT UP!"He shook his head,grinning smugly. "See? Two goals accomplished. One:try out kissing. Miserable failure, no doubt your fault,but a noble effort nonetheless.I should find your friend Carlee. She's probably better at it than you are."Why couldn't my glamour-piercing eyes have a laser function? I wouldn't kill him. I'd just burn the word "freak" into his forehead."Aren't you going to ask me what my second goal was?" He batted his eyelashed at me."No,I'm not."He nudged me in the ribs with his elbow. "You aren't crying anymore, are you?"I'd have to let go of his hand to throttle him. So that option was out. "Being so mad I'd like to kill you is better?”

“Bleep!" I screamed to the wall in front of me. "Bleep, bleep, bleep !" I kicked the dumpster, then grabbed at my foot. Now I was dirty, my toes hurt, and I felt like an idiot.”

“Something smashed to the ground. Jack looked at me, all the mugs forgotten. "I'm not going to let anyone kill you." He grinned. "If I don't get to, no one should.”