“If Jenks and she were to be believed, I structured my life to be as horrific as possible to have fun in bed, but having Ivy mad at me might be too much for even me right now.”
“I want you too much. I want you with me, in my life, in my bed. If i can have that, nothing else matters.”
“My goal in life is to get as old as I possibly can, to have as much fun as I possibly can, and then die.”
“And I was having too much fun to stop now.”
“I frankly confess that even if it were possible I should not wish to have free choice given to me, or to have anything left in my own hands by which I might strive for salvation.”
“And it dawned on me that I might have to change my inner thought patterns... that I would have to start believing in possibilities that I wouldn't have allowed before, that I had been closing my creativity down to a very narrow, controllable scale... that things had become too familiar and I might have to disorientate myself. p.71”