“Bah. What’s a little water to a pirate? (Barney)A bout of pneumonia if he’s not careful. (Morgan)”

“My daughter was asked by a little old lady in a London hotel restaurant what her daddy did. She answered, “He’s a pirate” - I was very proud of that answer.”

“There is no shortage of well-known pirates, including: Henry Morgan, Captain Kidd, Blackbeard, Blue beard, Yellowbeard, and Yellow beard with Black Roots, who surmised that, if blondes have more fun, then blond pirates must have a heck of a lot more fun.”

“Don’t worry. (Morgan)‘Don’t worry,’ he says. We’ve only got a madman trying to blow us out of the water, and the Marauder tells me not to worry. Tell me, Captain Pirate, at what point should I start to worry? When I see the whites of their eyes? Or when the sharks begin to circle me? (Serenity)”

“Could you really catch me? (Serenity)Absolutely. Besides, Barney would have my head if I let you make a mess on the deck. (Morgan)Oh, thanks. I’m glad chivalry is alive and well on the high seas. (Serenity)”

“I know part of the problem, of course. The disorientation, the distraction, the difficulty focusing-all classic Phase one signs of deliria. But I don't care. If pneumonia felt this good I'd stand out in the snow in the winter with bare feet and no coat on, or march into the hospital and kiss pneumonia patients.”