“I don't think normal exists.”

“I don't like him," I explained. "He annoys the hell out of me ninety-six percent of the time, and sometimes I'd like nothing better than to strangle him to death. But at the same time I... I want him to be happy. I think about him way more than I should, and I -""You love him.”

“I don't really do friends,' I told him.'Good,' he said. 'I don't want you to "do" me. We've established the flaws in that plan already...”

“Just remember to do what makes you happy, okay? Don’t lie to yourself because you think it’s safer. Realitydoesn’t work like that…. I think I told you that before.”She had.But I’d been running for so long I wasn’t sure what I wanted anymore.”

“I was thinking about how much I wanted to reenact that part in the shower with my hot, sexy, gorgeous girlfriend. And how she wouldn't need a butt double because she's perfect already.""You smooth talker, you.""I was also thinking how much sexier I am than that guy she was screwing in the shower.”

“Just when I think you might have a soul, you say shit like that.”

“While I'm sure this is going to be a fascinating story,' I interrupted. 'I don't care. I'm having a major parental crisis that sort of outshines your little tantrum, and frankly it seems like my dad agrees with you. I have a party to get ready for, can we do this later?”