“If you ever carry forth a plot that threatens my golden queen, you will die choking on your own balls and you'll do it while staring in my eyes”

“Now, you will leave with no trunks filled with Korwahk’s bounty in your greedy, fat hands. What you will leave with is your life and the knowledge that if you ever carry forth a plot that threatens my golden queen, you will die choking on your own balls and you’ll do it while staring in my eyes.”

“Let the grass die. I let almost all of my indoor plants die from neglect while I was writing the book. There are all kinds of ways to live. You can take your choice. You can keep a tidy house, and when St. Peter asks you what you did with your life, you can say, 'I kept a tidy house, I made my own cheese balls.”

“This next is my grandest sorrow, this grief I brought my own to carry, the weight of which threatened to crush all I had.It’s followed, fittingly enough, by him. While I was at my darkest, he came for me.”

“The big rules of knife fighting are (a) do not try it at home, and (b) the whole point is never, ever use the blade. It is there to distract your opponent. While he stares at the gleaming steel, you kick his balls to kingdom come--he's all yours. Just a tip!”

“My queen? You have a strange look in your eyes. Are you unwell?I was just... remembering.”