“I started to be really proud of the fact I was gay even though I wasn't”

“I am not gay, although I wish I were, just to piss off homophobes.”

“I knew I was different. I thought that I might be gay or something because I couldn't identify with any of the guys at all. None of them liked art or music. They just wanted to fight and get laid. It was many years ago but it gave me this real hatred for the average American macho male.”

“I would like to get rid of the homophobes, sexists, and racists in our audience. I know they're out there and it really bothers me.”

“I really haven't had that exciting of a life. There are a lot of things I wish I would have done, instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life. So I pretty much like to make it up. I'd rather tell a story about somebody else.”

“Rape is one of the most terrible crimes on earth and it happens every few minutes. The problem with groups who deal with rape is that they try to educate women about how to defend themselves. What really needs to be done is teaching men not to rape. Go to the source and start there.”

“I just hope I don't become so blissful I become boring. I think I'll always be neurotic enough to do something weird.”