“There are a lot of things I wish I would have done, instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life.”

“I really haven't had that exciting of a life. There are a lot of things I wish I would have done, instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life. So I pretty much like to make it up. I'd rather tell a story about somebody else.”

“I just hope I don't become so blissful I become boring. I think I'll always be neurotic enough to do something weird.”

“I am not gay, although I wish I were, just to piss off homophobes.”

“I was tired of pretending that I was someone else just to get along with people, just for the sake of having friendships.”

“People think of life as being so sacred and they feel like this is their only chance and they have to do something with their life and make an impact As far as I'm concerned, it's just a pitstop for the afterlife. It's just a little test to see how you can handle reality.”

“I only remember a few things about Jimmy Carter. He had big lips and liked peanuts. I now know that Jimmy Carter was and is a good man.”