“Every gay man should be familiar with Bert and Ernie.""And why is that?"Reece rolled his eyes, smiling. "Everyone knows that they're lovers."Ben stopped what he was doing and looked at the man incredulously. "Okay, Reece, seriously, can you hear yourself?""They are!" Reece said. "They live together, share a bedroom; I'm telling you the sexual tension is very palpable." Ben raised an eyebrow and said nothing. Reece cleared his throat. "You're going to break up with me now, aren't you?”

“As long as you're interested, that's all that matters." "I'm interested. I'm fucking obsessed.""That's it, baby." Ben whispered. "You fuck yourself on me. Feel me all the way inside." "Oh, God," Reece gasped."You've no idea," Ben growled, "no idea what it does to me; how fucking possessive it makes me feel to see you bouncing on my cock.”

“Aw, come on, admit it—you feel like Cinderella, don’t you?” “No, Darren, I don’t. And do you know why?” “No, sugar, you tell me why.” “Because I’m a man. I’ve got a big fat one and I like to fuck other guys.” Darren was laughing over the phone now, and it made Reece grin. “And Ben isn’t a prince, he’s a cop. A big, sexy cop who fucks like a machine. He’s a man. I’m a man. We’re men.” He nodded sharply. “Now fuck off. I’m arranging flowers.”

“I knew you were all smitten and shit, but fuck, you really do love this guy." The smirk in Darren's voice was obvious. And annoying. "Aw, come on, admit it - you feel like Cinderella, don't you?" "No, Darren, I don't. And do you know why?""No sugar, tell me why.""Because I'm a man. I've got a big fat one and I like to fuck other guys." Darren was laughing over the phone now, and it made Reece grin. "And Ben isn't a prince, he's a cop. A big, sexy cop who fucks like a machine. He's a man. I'm a man. We're men." He nodded sharply. "Now fuck off. I'm arranging flowers.”

“Has anybody ever told you you're an evil woman?" -Reece"Who, me?" -Erin"Yes, you." -Reece"Li'l ole me?" -Erin"Sadistic goddess you, yes." -Reece"Do you want me to stop?" -Erin"Do you want me to hold you down and bang you like a screen door?" -Reece"Don't threaten the sadisticgoddess, Reece." -Erin”

“Oh man, Alex. That's sad. Seriously, mate, go get yourself laid.""What?" He gave Baldrick a quick kiss on his little head--he didn't care how stupid he looked, he loved his ugly cat--and put him down on his kitty bed in the corner."Isn't that what single sad people do--get cats when they've given up on human companionship?”

“Hey, Reece.”There was nothing but silence for a while and I waited.Then Reece said, “Expected it to happen eventually, darlin’, but didn’t expect it to hit me that hard the first time I heard a man answer your phone.”