“A penis has never been something that you pick up and put down and put away idly without consideration.”

“Of the 2,639,857 faggots in the New York city area, 2,639,857 think primarily with their cocks.You didn't know that the cock was a thinking organ?Well, by this time, you should know that it is.”

“Holy shit," somebody muttered in the dark."A virgin," sputtered another."I didn't know they still made them.""He just did.”

“You know, the world is all about balance. You lose something here... maybe somebody else picks it up over there.”

“All of my work has been leading to this”

“You were worried about me?” “Of course I was, buddy. I would never have forgiven myself if something had happened. You didn’t think I’d be worried about you?” “No. I didn’t think you cared.” Dad looks sad. And surprised. I’m not sure why. “Really, buddy? You didn’t think I cared?” “No.” “Well, I do. A lot.” “Okay.” “I guess I need to do a better job of showing you.” “Yes. You could do a better job.” Dad laughs. And he hugs me again.”

“The next time you face something that is unexpected, unwanted and uncertain....consider that it just might be a gift.”