“Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all thirty feet tall.”
“The perfect Christmas tree? All Christmas trees are perfect!”
“That is a perfectly good mini Christmas tree. We are going to sell that to charity because that is what Christmas is all about.”
“Joseph McElroy is nineteen feet tall and can crush bombproof limousines with his biceps. He will live to be four hundred and thirty-five.”
“There is something about spending Christmas alone, naked, sitting by the Christmas tree gripping a shotgun, that lets you know your life is spinning dangerously outta control.”
“It is not a Christmas tree!" said the King, so firmly that all the girls stopped jumping about. "This is a house of mourning. It is nothing more than a tree. I thought it would look nice. Inside. That is all.”