“It’s complicated,” I said in defense, hands going up to show surrender.“Talk slowly,” Jenna retorted derisively.“Okay, I deserved that,” I admitted.”

“I love you present tense,” I whispered, and then put my hand on the middle of his chest and said, “It’s okay, Gus. It’s okay. It is. It’s okay, you hear me?” I had—and have—absolutely no confidence that he could hear me. I leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “Okay,” I said. “Okay.”

“I glanced around at everyone. “It’s going to be bad. Worse than bad, probably.”“We’ll manage it,” Cal said.“Yeah,” Jenna said, smiling shakily. “We’re kind of badass in our own right.”I gripped her hand. “Damn straight.”

“We sat there, not talking, for a few minutes. He ate the Moon Pie; only skinny people can scarf down junk food like that. Finally, I said, "Norman?""Yeah?""Are you ever going to show me the painting?""Man," he said. "You are, like, so impatient.""I am not," I said. "I've been waiting forever.""Okay, okay." He stood up and went over to the corner, picking up the painting and bringing it over to rest against the bright pink belly of one of the mannequins. Then, he handed me a bandana. "Tie that on.”

“Jenna nodded, wiping tears away with the back of her hand. She leaned toward David and they hugged again. "I was never okay with losing you," she said quietly. "You know that, right?”

“Okay,” he said. “I gotta go to sleep. It’s almost one.” 
“Okay,” I said.
 “Okay,” he said. 
I giggled and said, “Okay.” And then the line was quiet but not dead. I almost felt like he was there in my room with me, but in a way it was better, like I was not in my room and he was not in his, but instead we were together in some invisible and tenuous third space that could only be visited on the phone. “Okay,” he said after forever. “Maybe okay will be our always.”
 “Okay,” I said.
 It was Augustus who finally hung up.”