“I love letters from little kids. Adults never proclaim themselves 'your #1 fan!”

“Kid 1: *examining my gorgeous strawberry and blueberry pies*: Wow, Mom, your pies don’t look awful this time.Me (Ilona): ...~A little later~Kid 2: *wandering into the kitchen*Kid 1: Hey, you’ve got to see these pies. *opening the stove*Kid 2: Wow. They are not ugly this time.Kid 1: I know, right?”

“Hands down, the biggest thrill is to get a letter from a kid saying, I loved your book. Will you write me another one? ”

“I couldn't believe when I first got a fan letter from Al Pacino, it was unreal.”

“I loved youlike a man loves a woman he never touches, onlywrites to, keeps little photographs of. I would haveloved you more if I had sat in a small room rolling acigarette and listened to you piss in the bathroom,but that didn’t happen. your letters got sadder.your lovers betrayed you. kid, I wrote back, alllovers betray.”

“Kids are never the problem. They are born scientists. The problem is always the adults. They beat the curiosity out of kids. They outnumber kids. They vote. They wield resources. That's why my public focus is primarily adults.”