“Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.”

“Two things reduce prejudice: education and laughter.”

“It is wise to remember that you are one of those who can be fooled some of the time.”

“You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.”

“A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.”

“You don't need to take a persons advice to make him feel good, just ask him for it.”

“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?”