“Let bygones be bygones because everybody knew that forgiveness was divine.”

“So might I suggest at your earliest convenience that you pay a visit to the Okins Funeral Salon to make arrangements?""Why'd I wanna do that?" she says so damn snippy."Because on my return visit you can count on my beatin' the ever-lovin' shit outta you with a rusty shovel. Twice.”

“...And he shouldn't have talked to Mama in the hurtful ways he did neither. Calling her despicable names because she wanted to do things her own independent way instead of his. He uses his silver tongue like a sword. Nicking away at your heart, cutting word by cutting word. Maybe silence really is golden.”

“THINGS TO DO THIS SUMMER1. Make Father Mickey lose his black Irish temper.2. Wear a turtleneck, take in a deep breath and get strangled.3. Mary Lane takes the picture.4. Practice getting away.5. Sally puts the pedal to the metal.6. Randa Rhonda Rendezvous”

“His mean justified his end.”

“Can you see the fireworks from Heaven?”

“Troo hits the hay every night like a bale falling out of our old barn loft.”