“I want to ruin you Freda, in the best way possible.”

“If I was into girls, I'd do you,” I tell him honestly. He leans forward conspiratorially. ”Psst, I'll let you in on a secret Fred,” he glances sheepishly from side to side. ”I actually have a cock. Don't tell anyone, it would ruin my reputation. But feel free to do me any time you want.”

“I belong to you. I've belonged to you since the beginning, since before I even knew that I did," he rambles. "I'll never hurt you again. I'd rather die than to hurt you”

“You've got a wonderful way with words, disgusting but wonderful.”

“It feels like nobody in the history of the world has loved another person as much as I love you. I love you so much it hurts. You make me smile, you make me laugh, you make me burn.”

“I care about you more than I care about myself, Fred.”

“You have sex on the brain twenty-four seven Viv. I think you might need therapy.""Perhaps I do. Don't get me wrong I'm no Russell Brand, but I do have quite an avid interest in shagging.”