“It occurs to me that cricket is not the true sport in London - gossip is.”

“It is not true that the English invented cricket as a way of making all other human endeavors look interesting and lively; that was merely an unintended side effect. ...It is the only sport that incorporates meal breaks. It is the only sport that shares its name with an insect. It is the only sport in which spectators burn as many calories as the players-more if they are moderately restless.”

“In my neighborhood, gossip is a competitive sport that’s been raised to Olympic standard, and I never diss gossip; I revere it with all my heart.”

“...good-Samaritanism in London is considered an extreme sport - like base-jumping or crocodile-wrestling.”

“They were unironic enthusiasts for all the mass pleasures the culture offered: television, NASCAR, cruises, Disney World, sports, celebrity gossip, and local politics.”

“What did you tell her?" (...)"That we found Mrs. Parrish wandering the streets in a scandalous manner last night, and remain in London to circulate gossip”