“Jacob: 'So have you heard that in seventy years there won't be any gingers left on Earth?'Jules: 'Really? Huh. Nature. Awesome.'Sam: 'Actually, it's not true. It was some bogus report cooked up by a hair-dye company to get some extra press.'Jacob: 'Sure it was, Fanta-pants.'Ava: 'He's right. The recessive gene that causes red hair is totally able to skip generations, so redheads won't die out due to genetics.'Sam: 'Thank you, Ava. It's nice to know that someone around here is sensible.'Ava: 'Of course, redheads might become extinct because they find it so hard to get laid...”

“It's not natural, Ava. For me not to touch you, it's not right.”

“Everything is so much more bearable with you around, Ava.”

“There was a crackle. Kobe's voice came through the cans. "What would you guys do," he said, apropos of nothing, "if Jules turned into a lizard?"Another crackle. "Hey!" Jules said."It wouldn't happen," said Jacob, and I saw him shrug in the half-light."But what if?"I pressed the talk button on my cans. "There's an old fish tank in our garage," I said. "I'd put Jules in it, and then get a heat rock from the pet shop."I heard Sam's low chuckle. "Make sure you wash your hands first.""Why?""So you don't get any lizardy diseases.""I don't have any lizardy diseases!" Jules's voice was getting higher."Not yet, but wait until you're a lizard.""What's a heat rock?" asked Jacob."It's a rock," I told him, "that you heat up. Lizards like them. Anyway, once I'd done that, I'd take you to see my cousin Adam.""IS HE A WIZARD?”

“Ava, when a man gets a calculator out at the end of a meal to work out what you owe. It's usually not a good sign.”

“I get a good shot in maybe I'll know some fuckin' sense into you. Then maybe you'll be thinkin' of Ava when you fuck her, not some other man's piece you can't have.”