“It truly sucks to doubt your friends when you only have one or two of them, I realized.”

“When the leeches have sucked enough blood, one simply has to sprinkle some salt on their backs and they fall off – But you, my friend, how can I get rid of you? Your despairing cousin”

“I realized then that if I could teach my children only one or two basic principles, tolerance would be one of them.”

“Needy people are like newborns, I have come to realize. One intoxicated night and BAM! You are stuck with this problem. You finally take it home and it wants to keep you up all night and cries when it isn’t sucking on various parts of your anatomy. It wants you there for everything – rocking, feeding, burping, changing... It’s ridiculous. If I wanted a kid I would have one. Until then, grow the hell up and stand on your own two feet, you little crazy.”

“What if your heart stopped when you saw that person, and only after that did you realize that they truly were everything you ever wanted?”

“We can only truly love, when we realized we have been loved all along, by the one person who gave their life for simply our forgiveness, and for us to truly live.”