“If she loves you back, no woman is going to complain about the hour if a man calls her to proclaim his undying love.”

“Hey, where are you going?" His voice, confused yet curious, called after me. "Hey. Why didn't your mother name you Maybe, or We'll see, or What's-Your-Number? That way, we could call our first born Absolutely.”

“I was crazy in love with you in high school, and you broke my heart the day you hooked up with someone else our sophomore year. Then you broke it again when you promised me you’d dump him the night we kissed and go out with me instead, because the next morning, you forgot all about me.”

“And I don’t want you to love me enough for the both of us. I’d rather carry my own portion, thank you very much. I love you so much it consumes me.”

“Sometimes a man can be a lot like a farm. He lets his heart lay fallow for a while, and instead of his feelings dying out, they just go dormant, his emotions growing deeper and stronger as time passes. A person only needs to clear away the weeds on the surface to uncover them.”

“When you love, you open yourself up to numerous vulnerabilities and worries and responsibilities you never imagined existed because suddenly there’s someone else in the world who’s more important to you than you are. That’s what makes it so tough.”

“You’re a man, darling. There’s something sick and twisted inside you, making you relish girly torture. I don’t understand it myself. Never did.”