“We've survived the Black Plague, the Titanic, and Pearl Harbor just to name a few. Not to mention the Disco Period.”

“The last time I had PMS a roast chicken popped out of the oven and danced the Macarena.Krebs had walked in just as the chicken started dancing. By then he was pretty much used to anything and only asked if the chicken shouldn’t be doing the Chicken Dance instead.”

“If you would only be willing to take the time to truly get to know me. I know that we would spawn beautiful offspring together, my lovely Jazz.I could give you riches you can only imagine. I have much to offer a beauty like you.” She felt her smile tremble on her lips, then lost her hard-won control. “I would rather eat dead rotting flesh,” she replied, her disgust winning out over her fear of insulting him. His eyes lit up at her words and bright-red gas literally crawled up his back making the dead fish scent of the wharves smell like French perfume. “You do not know my kind as well as you pretend to, my sexy Jazz. You just spoke of our most popular aphrodisiac.”

“Some things can’t be ignored. You can only conquer your past if you choose to face it.”

“What did he do? Channel Vincent Price and transport the Tower of London'to the Hollywood Hills?”

“...and a new dress because her asshole husband had bought an ugly funeral outfit she was stuck in for eternity”

“The blinding colors on his tie resembled a Rorschach test and prompted Jazz to slip on her sunglasses.”