“Poor people have few choices in life, and most of the time you don't think too much about it. You get the best you can and do without when necessary, and hope to God you won't be wiped out by something you can't control. But there are moments it hurts, where there is something you want in the very marrow of your bones and you know there is no way you can have it.”

“That's what life is. One problem after another. You can't control any of it. All you can do is reach out for something good whenever you can. And hold on no matter what.”

“We're all creatures of complex needsand desires. The only certain thing in a romantic relationship is that you will both change, and one morning you will wake up, go the mirror, and see a stranger. Youwill have what you wanted, and discoveryou want something different. You thinkyou know who you are, and then you'llsurprise yourself. In all the choices in front of you, Restless, one thing is clear: love is notsomething to be thrown away lightly.There was something about this man, beyondcoincidences of timing and opportunity,that drew you to him. Before you giveup on the marriage . . . give him a chance.Be honest with him about the needs thataren't being met, the dreams you want topursue. Let him find out who you reallyare. Let him help you in the work of openingthat door, so the two of you can finallymeet after all these years.How do you know he can't satisfy youremotional needs? How can you be sure hedoesn't long for magic and passion just asyou do? Can you state with absolute certaintythat you know everything there is toknow about him?There are rewards to be gained from theeffort, even if it fails. And it will take courageas well as patience, Restless. Tryeverything you can . . . fight to stay with aman who loves you. Just for now, putaside the question of what you might havehad with someone else, and focus on whatyou can have, what you do have, at thisvery moment. I hope you'll find new questions,and that your husband might be theanswer.”

“I didn't expect it was going to be easy. But hard work is a lot easier to tolerate when it's something you want to do instead of something you have no choice about.”

“But we have to find ways of compromising when we disagree on something. You know what compromise is, right?""Uh-huh. It's when you don't get to have everything your way and I don't get to have everything my way, and no one's happy.”

“Have you ever wanted something so much that you would do anything to have it - even knowing that it was bad for you?""Of course," Adam replied. "All truly enjoyable things in life are invariably bad for you - and they are even better when done to excess.”

“No," I said automatically, "don't do anything about Dad. You can't fix my relationship with him.""I can block or run interference.""Thanks, Jack, but I don't need blocking, and I really don't need any more interference."He looked annoyed. "Well, why did you waste all that time complaining to me if you didn't want me to do something about it?""I don't want you to fix my problems. I just wanted you to listen.""Hang it all, Haven, talk to a girlfriend if all you want is a pair of ears. Guys hate it when you give us a problem and then don't let us do something about it. It makes us feel bad. And then the only way to make ourselves feel better is to rip a phone book in two or blow something up. So let's get this straight — I'm not a good listener. I'm a guy.""Yes you are." I stood and smiled. "Want to buy me a drink at an after work bar?""Now you're talking," my brother said, and we left the office.”