“Tell me about our legal issues. And use small words. I don't like to think at this hour of the morning. It hurts."~Leo to Merripen”

“Kev,” Win said calmly, stepping forward, “I would like to talk to you about something.”Merripen, attentive as always to his wife, gave her a frowning glance. “Now?”"Yes, now.”"Can’t it wait?”"No,” Win said equably. At his continued hesitation, she said, “I’m expecting.”Merripen blinked. “Expecting what?”"A baby.”They all watched as Merripen’s face turned ashen. “But how ...” he asked dazedly, nearly staggering as he headed to Win."How?” Leo repeated. “Merripen, don’t you remember that special talk we had before your wedding night?” He grinned as Merripen gave him a warning glance. Bending to Win’s ear, Leo murmured, “Well done. But what are you going to tell him when he discovers it was only a ploy?”"It’s not a ploy,” Win said cheerfully.Leo’s smile vanished, and he clapped a hand to his forehead. “Christ,” he muttered. “Where’s my brandy?” And he disappeared into the house."I’m sure he meant to say ‘congratulations,’ ” Beatrix remarked brightly, following the group as they all went inside.”

“Amelia told me once about a suspicion she'd had for a while. It bothered her quite a bit. She said that Win and I had fallen ill with scarlet fever, and you made the deadly nightshade syrup, you'd concocted far more than was necessary. And you kept a cup on it on Win's nightstand, like some sort of macabre nightcap. Amelia said that if Win had died, she thought you would have taken the rest of that poison. And I've always hated you for that. Because you forced me to stay alive without the woman I loved, while you had no bloody hell intention of doing the same."Merripen didn't answer, gave no sign that he registered Leo's words."Christ, man," Leo said huskily. "If you had the bollocks to die with her, don't you think you could work up the courage to live with her?”

“...You're not suited for this Merripen. You can't hold your liquor worth a damn. And unlike people such as me, who become quite amicable when they drink, you turn into a vile-tempered troll." Leo paused considering how best to provoke him. "Liquor brings out one's true inner nature, they say.”

“Did it fall out?" Leo asked. "Is she bald?""No, not at all. It's just that her hair is...green."To look at Leo's face, one would think it was Christmas morning. "What shade of green?""Leo, hush," Win said urgently. "You are not to torment her. It's been a very trying experience. We mixed a peroxide paste to take the green out, and I don't know if it worked or not. Amelia was helping her to wash it a little while ago. And no matter what the result is, you are to say nothing.""You're telling me that tonight, Marks will be sitting at the supper table with hair that matches the asparagus, and I'm not supposed to remark on it?" He snorted. "I'm not that strong.""Please, Leo," Poppy murmured, touching his arm. "If it were one of your sisters, you wouldn't mock.""Do you think that little shrew would have any mercy on me, were the situations reversed?" He rolled his eyes as he saw their expressions. "Very well, I'll try no to jeer. But I make no promises."Leo sauntered toward the house in no apparent hurry. He didn't deceive either of his sisters. "How long do you think it will take him to find her?" Poppy asked Win."Two, perhaps three minutes," Win replied, and they both sighed.”

“You were never one to moon over handsome boys, or talk about balls and parties, or dream about your future husband.”“That was because of Merripen,” Win admitted. “He was all I ever wanted.”

“Coming forward with a placating smile, Win handed him a piece of paper. "Of course we would never want to force you into a loveless marriage, dear. But we have put together a list of prospective brides, all of them lovely girls. Won't you take a glance and see if any of them appeals to you?"Deciding to humor her, Leo looked down at the list. "Marietta Newbury?""Yes," Amelia said. "What's wrong with her?""I don't like her teeth.""What about Isabella Charrington?""I don't like her mother.""Lady Blossom Tremaine?""I don't like her name.""Oh, for heaven's sake, Leo, that's not her fault.""I don't care. I can't have a wife named Blossom. Every night I would feel as if I were calling in one of the cows." Leo lifted his gaze heavenward. "I might as well marry the first woman off the street. Why, I'd be better off with Marks."Everyone was silent.”