“We knew we were doomed. The kiss was a warm acceptance of years of bickering, years of me consuming foods that I found barely edible and Henry tidying up after someone who already thought she had tidied up. When I kissed Henry I wasn't imagining Ex-boyfriend #13; I was picturing Husband #1.”

“I'm staying," Henry said, annoyed."Why?""Because, if I leave, it would be like abandoning two mentally challenged people in a nuclear waste dump.”

“I knew immediately that this was not going to work out. Hunter is the kind of guy who dates women who wear high heels and a cocktail dress on a first date. I can't even walk in heels, and I generally believe that someone has to earn the right to see my legs.”

“Mrs. Chandler shouted after us, "And I hope that was all-natural food coloring you put on my dog!”

“Your father and I haven't had this much quality time since our honeymoon.""So what?""So, what if we can't stand each other?”

“David's brow unfurled and he crouched down on the floor with his daughter. 'Did you have a fun time with your aunt Izzy?' he asked in a high squeaky voice.Sydney stared at him blankly.'Say good morning to Aunt Izzy.'Sydney stared at me blankly.'Remember me from last night?' I asked.'Did you have fun?' Maggie asked.'I wouldn't go that far,' I replied.'I was actually talking to Sydney, Maggie said.'Oh well, she'd probably agree. We had an okay time, didn't we, Sydney?''Why can't you talk to her like a normal person?' asked David. 'I'm the only one talking to her like a normal person. You sound like a eunuch.”

“It's not like I didn't think I had any demons. I did, but I could name them- and even provide an address and telephone number for each. As far as I was concerned, those demons could go to therapy instead of me.”