“I read, therefore, I matter.”

“Natural law says that matter cannot be created or destroyed, but that was pre-spanx.”

“Likewise, I would never be so rude as to not interrupt a friend. How else would she know I was listening?”

“A movie theater is Switzerland of the diet world.”

“It's fun to do something dumb. Not something really dumb, like my second marriage. That was really really dumb.”

“Great griefs are mute.”

“She kept an eye on the horizon, or where she thought it was, and understood that not everything that existed could be seen. Not every border was clear.”