“I'm a superstar alien from another galaxy! Where is my herd?”

“If i am an alien from other galaxy then nothing is mine in this planet...”

“Earth is the crossroads of every possible alien. We're the McDonald's next to the highway of the galaxy.”

“Seeking a woman who looks like a feminized version of L. Ron Hubbard to help me decode intergalactic messages that I might receive on my Alien Communication Helmet. And after we receive and decode the messages, this female friend could help me make spaghetti with my aforementioned Alien Communication Helmet (it's basically a strainer with antennas). Please don’t send me telepathic thoughts, as it might disrupt transmissions from other galaxies. E-mail only if interested.”

“Maybe there's a galaxy with a planet that's just a little more tilted, with a sun that shines just a little bit darker, and that's where I'm supposed to be, where it somehow makes sense to feel this broken.”

“Calvin: Trick or Treat!Adult: Where's your costume? What are you supposed to be?Calvin: I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak!...Boy, am I scary or what?”