“Jack: "For Christ's sake, it wasn't like I was on vacation. I've been in Iowa, in cornfield hell! Keely: Did you just say you got cornholed in Iowa?”

“Sometimes you're so nice, I can't believe I ever hated you." —Keely to Jack”

“You actually fucked her? What, did her forked tongue feel exceptionally good on your dick or something?" —Keely to Jack after meeting his ex-girlfriend.”

“I missed you, you dickhead. I missed you so goddamn much. Don't you ever ever ever take off and leave me like that again, do you hear me?”

“Umm. Wow. Did it grow? Because it looks bigger.""Kissin' your red-hot love flower made this stem grow big and hard just for you, baby doll."AJ managed to meet his eyes. "Love flower?""Thought maybe you wanted some kinda sweet-talkin' love words first.”

“Right now, AJ. I wanna pin you against the wall and fuck you hard enough to rattle the stalls. Then I want to bend you over the railing’ and take you from behind, sinkin’ my teeth into that spot at the base of your neck that makes you scream my name.”AJ swallowed. “Um. Let’s start with just one and work our way down the wish list, okay?”

“You ever heard the phrase 'nice guys finish last'? It's true. Been true my whole life. So, maybe it'd be nice for me for a change, if someone thought I was worth fightin' for.”