“You actually fucked her? What, did her forked tongue feel exceptionally good on your dick or something?" —Keely to Jack after meeting his ex-girlfriend.”

“Jack: "For Christ's sake, it wasn't like I was on vacation. I've been in Iowa, in cornfield hell! Keely: Did you just say you got cornholed in Iowa?”

“Sometimes you're so nice, I can't believe I ever hated you." —Keely to Jack”

“I half expected you to whip out your dick and pee on me as you snarled at him and marked your territory.”

“The more she stared, the happier his dick was to swell with pride, doing a stellar flagpole imitation.About a year later, Tierney dragged her gaze away from his groin and looked him in the eye. "This is why I was against casual Thursdays. There's always that one person who takes it too far.”

“Back off, perv! I have a black belt in taekwondoand I will fuck you up if you take another step towardme.”Chase raised his hands in surrender, trying really,really hard to keep his eyes on hers. “Whoa, there,crouching tiger. Let’s just take this down a notch.”

“Bran grabbed her sleeve, forcing her to look at him. "What in the hell is goin' on with you?" "What is wrong with me? What is wrong with your goats? They're evil! And they're laughing at me! Look at their smug little goat faces! Go on. Look at them!”