“If you fall down those stairs and break both of your legs, don't come running to me!”

“Who wouldn't want to see some owl eggs?"I said, "Come on then, they are down here."He said, "Tallulah, the answer to who wouldn't want to see some owl eggs is... me!!!!”

“Hello, my sister, Libby, also your daughter, is snogging a potato in my bed. What are you going to do about it?' Dad started yelling uncontrollably. I wonder if he is having the male menopause? If he starts growing breasts, I will definitely be running away with the circus.”

“This soft grass suggests 'softness' to me, but also at the same time 'lying-down-ness'.”

“Vaisey said, "Is it because your parents don't understand you?"Charlie said, "No, it's because our parents understand us very well, and that is why they wanted us to go away.”

“You wouldn't say ' You've got the crappest eyes I've ever seen. Your eyes make me physically sick.”

“Anyway, then it said on the news, 'And tonight the Prime Minister has just got to Number Ten.'I looked down at Jas and said, 'Ooer.' Meaning he'd got to number ten on the snogging scale. And then we both laughed like loons.Vati just looked at us like we were mad.”