“I wondered if perhaps I'd gone mad. I had known this man less than twenty-four hours and already I wanted to raise his children.”

“I'd known him less then forty-eight hours and already I'd seen how he looked when he came, tasted his cooking, and had my ass handed to me playing Dance Dance Revolution, and now I was going to practically be living with him.”

“I walked in on my folks doing it doggy style less than four hours ago.""Waitress!" Jonas screamed, clicking his fingers madly. "Bring two!" then, more quietly,"You want a neck massage? A bedtime story? A bullet in the ear?”

“It was like fate was out to make me do everything I'd ever sworn I wouldn't in the course of twenty-four hours.”

“Unreal. I'm feeling nostalgic for something that happened less than twenty-four hours ago. This has got to be a record.”

“If I had only known kittens can climb drapes, perch on top of a traverse rod, and then screech like some femme fatale in a low budget horror flick to be rescued. That a kitten sounds like a herd of buffalo running on hardwood floors in the middle of the night. If I had only known a kitten’s claws can sink through a sheet into your balls while you’re jerking off. An old adage says, “Live and learn,” and I amassed an encyclopedic amount out cat wisdom in less than twenty-four hours.”