“I guess he was making sure I could get in okay without my keys.Oh, good God! Don’t show me the sweet, considerate side! I won’t stand a chance.”
“I think back to my banter with Cash about sexual harassment. I don’t doubt he pushes the boundaries, but never once did I get the impression he might force himself on me or make unwanted advances. I just hope to God he doesn’t know that his advances aren’t unwanted. I just wish they were.”
“The fingers of his free hand work their way into my hair and tilt my head to the side as he deepens the kiss. He gets more aggressive, like he wants to gobble me up. And I want him to. God, I want him to.”
“Regardless of my feelings on the issue with Taryn, I know it won’t bode well for me if I let Cash train me. I just don’t trust myself around him. Not completely anyway.”
“I couldn’t wait for high school to be over. I didn’t let my exasperation show, however. I’d long since discovered how to live inside the shark tank without getting eaten or becoming a shark: never let ‘em see you sweat. Don’t show any emotion, no matter how many you’re feeling. It just reveals your weaknesses and, to them, weaknesses are like blood in the water. I try never to let them see me get angry, upset, defensive, flustered, uncertain, anything. I’m sure that, to them, I seem somewhat robotic, but it keeps me out of trouble and keeps them at arm’s length. And that’s how I survive”
“I’m lying on Cash’s chest, tracing his tattoo.“What does this mean?” I whisper.“It’s the Chinese symbol for awesome,” he teases lightly.I giggle. “If it’s not, which I imagine it isn’t, then it should be.”“Are you paying me a compliment? I just want to be sure, so I don’t miss it.”I slap his ribs. “You make it sound like I’m mean and horrible because I don’t throw myself at your feet.”“You don’t have to throw yourself at my feet. Although if you want to, I’m sure I can think of something for you to do while you’re down there.”I look up at him and he’s waggling his eyebrows again.“I’m sure you could.” Shaking my head, I settle back onto his chest and resume tracing the ink shapes. “Seriously, what do they mean?”Cash is quiet for so long I begin to think he’s not going to answer me. But then he finally speaks.“It’s a collage of things that remind me of my family.”
“You worry too much. Can’t you just trust me?”“I don’t know,” I answer him honestly.He nods in acceptance. “You’ll learn to. I promise.”And then he kisses me. It’s a slow, deep kiss that carries meaning and emotion, neither of which I know how to interpret.I pull away to speak, but he puts his finger over my lips. “Shhh, just let me love you, okay? Don’t think. Just feel.”