“I read somewherethat all this -the people, the animals,the mountains, the rivers -is just God dreaming.I wish he'd wake the fuck up.”

“Jen's Mum Will WriteJen's mum writes advertising copy.She specializes in white goods:washing machines, dryers, fridges,freezers, dishwashers.She hates these applianceshulkingin corners,power-hungry and fractious.One day, she will have a wood stove,and she'll write about things that matter-she will write about birth and death,about love and the absence of love,about fathers and children,about mothers and daughters,about lovers and friends.She'll write about the whole goddamnwonderful, awful businessof loving and being loved”

“But you're wrong if you think that the joy of life comes principally from human relationships. God's placed it all around us. It's in every thing. In anything we can experience. people just need to change the way they look at those things.”

“Jim: I want you to search every place in this hotel where a crate of dynamite could possibly be stored.Artie: Right. And if I find it?Jim: I'll arrange for someone to pour cold water over your face to revive you.Wild Wild West (TV) Season 2Night of the Infernal Machine”

“Artie: It's in here.Jim: Let's check this [box] first, Artie.Artie: Oh. [Finding a fake Sword of Kuniyoshi] Phony! How do you like that? Phony!Jim: Artie...so are our bonds.Artie: Oh. You can't trust anybody these days.Wild Wild West (TV) Season 3Night of the Samurai”

“That girl is a grade one a-hole with a severe attitudinal problem.”

“We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he does not admire it”