“Hello," She said.There was a long silence."Hello," said Artemis again."Are you talking to me?" said the tree. It had a faint Australian accent."Yes," said Artemis. "I am Artemis." If the tree experienced any recognition, it didn't show it. "I'm the goddess of hunting and chastity," said Artemis.Another silence. The the tree said, "I'm Kate. I work in mergers and acquisitions for Goldman Sachs.""Do you know what happened to you, Kate?" said Artemis.The longest silence of all. Artemis was just about to repeat the question when the tree replied."I think I've turned into a tree," it said. "Yes," said Artemis. "You have.""Thank God for that," said the tree. "I thought I was going mad."Then the tree seemed to reconsider this. "Actually," it said, "I think I would rather be mad." Then, with hope in its voice: "Are you sure I haven't gone mad?""I'm sure," said Artemis. "You're a tree. A eucalyptus. Subgenus of mallee. Variegated leaves.""Oh," said the tree."Sorry," said Artemis."But with variegated leaves?""Yes," said Artemis. "Green and Yellow."The tree seemed pleased. "Oh well, there's that to be grateful for," it said.”

“Artemis Fowl will never be secondary.""I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second?" said Holly.”

“Artemis turned and stared at his friend with the blue eyes. Holly was staring back, and she was smiling. “I remember,” she said aloud. “You saved me.”Artemis smiled back. “It never happened,” he said.”

“And after a long time the boy came back again. "I am sorry, Boy," said the tree, "but I have nothing left to give you- My apples are gone." "My teeth are too weak for apples," said the boy. "My branches are gone," said the tree. "You cannot swing on them-" "I am too old to swing on branches," said the boy. "My trunk is gone," said the tree. "You cannot climb-" "I am too tired to climb," said the boy. "I am sorry," sighed the tree. "I wish that I could give you something... but I have nothing left. I am an old stump. I am sorry...""I don't need very much now," said the boy, "just a quiet pleace to sit and rest. I am very tired." "Well," said the tree, straightening herself up as much as she could, "well, an old stump is a good for sitting and resting. Come, Boy, sit down. Sit down and rest."And the boy did.And the tree was happy.”

“That will be her undoing," gasped Artemis, already suffering under the weight of the flak jacket. "Artemis Fowl will never be secondary.""I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second?" said Holly.”

“Wait," said Butler. "Just wait, Holly. Artemis has a plan." He squinted through the green dome. "What is your plan, Artemis?"All Artemis could do was smile and shrug.”