“I am not a total pervert. Although, to be honest, consider the night we’ve been having. First handcuffs, andnow this? Way more kinky than I expected.”“Please,” M’cal said. “Do not talk.”“You like the strong and silent type, huh?”“If you do not shut up, I will kill you with my voice.”“I love it when you talk dirty.”“Fine. Which would you prefer to lose first? Your soul or your testicles?”“You know, you’re just a bit obsessed with chopping off balls. Do you have issues with your masculinity?”

“Come on. Let’s go and sit down. I need to have a beer and a nervousbreakdown.”“Talk first, then breakdown. I want answers, not drool.”“You used to love my drool.”“Ha. You funny.”

“Jesus, Dean. I don’t know why you have me around with her watching your back”“You’re just jealous. But don’t worry. One day you too will have your very own little Amazon.”“I’ll just settle for a woman.”“If you’re lonely, you can have the inflatable sex doll Blue gave me for my birthday. I don’t want the twoof you to miss out on an opportunity for love.”“You didn’t like her?”“I wasn’t man enough to satisfy her cravings. I’m sure you’ll be different.”

“Kidnappings, magic, long-lost love of my life. Nothing to rock the boat. All in a day’s work.”“Of course,” he said dryly. “Which is why you’re calling me in the middle of the night while I’m on myhoneymoon.”“Man, you’ve been married three months. The honeymoon is over. ““Not until we leave Russia,” Artur said. “And never even after that.”Which was like hearing the Incredible Hulk start talking like Gandhi.”

“How’s his appendix?”“Like crap. They almost didn’t catch it in time, and he’s still doing the ass-plant in a hospital bed, beingdoted on by an army of hot nurses. Makes me sick.”“Maybeyou should rupture something.”“Any more of these stories out of you and I just might. ”

“Expect the unexpected, my mother once said. Because the unexpected most certainly will be expecting you.”

“Moscow was, as some said, the most beautiful mistress a man could ever want, but never cross her: like any good woman, she might just cut off your balls for the hell of it.”