“Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn’t any. But this wrongs the jackass.”

“The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.”

“The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and a seal.”

“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.”

“The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creatures that cannot.”

“The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter. ’tis the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning.”

“Sufficient unto the day is one baby. As long as you are in your right mind don't you ever pray for twins. Twins amount to a permanent riot; and there ain't any real difference between triplets and a insurrection.- The Babies speech 1879”