“The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.”

“Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist.”

“He sat looking at it with his eyes protruding in the manner popularized by snails, looking like something stuffed by a taxidermist who had learned his job from a correspondence course and had only got as far as lesson three.”

“The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”

“Above the rustic stone fireplace was a deer's head-but not an everyday deer's head. This mangy thing surveyed the room with a huge toothy grin. Either he had died with a smile on his face or the taxidermist had had a rare sense of humor. But the funniest thing was that, somehow, the ridiculous creature seemed to fit the room perfectly.”

“The difference between death and taxes is death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”