“He says that I'm as subtle as a fart at a funeral.”
“Any man can fart in a closed room and say that he commands the wind”
“They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.”
“left to my own devices, I'm content to wake myself with a fart.”
“I fart, you fart, he farts, she farts.Let’s not deny it, people. Farting is a regular, healthy, and hilarious part of life. Squeezing out big plumes of noxious gas doesn’t always smell good, but it generally feels might fine.”
“Why was he smiling? Oh crap, I had drooled on him. Or maybe farted? Please, anything but a fart!”