“The dachshund is a perfectly engineered dog. It is precisely long enough for a single standard stroke of the back, but you aren't paying for any superfluous leg.”
“To an engineer, good enough means perfect. With an artist, there's no such thing as perfect.”
“If you aren't outraged, then you just aren't paying attention”
“How long should a man's legs be? Long enough to touch the ground.”
“Any fool could see that you're at the reeling end of a long, strong rope - soon enough, It'll be tugging you back.”
“Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.”