“I promise I'll do anything for you, especialy if it's easy.Homer Simpson”

“I didn't lie, I was writing fiction with my mouth."Homer Simpson”

“You toyed with my heart, like it was a toy heart. (Lisa Simpson)”

“[Ned Flanders]: Well looks like someone's having a pre-rapture party. [Homer Simpson]: No, Flanders. Its a meeting of gay witches for abortion, you wouldn't be interested.”

“You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try.'Homer Simpson”

“You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on."Homer Simpson”

“This doesn't happen in America! Maybe Ohio, but not in America!"Homer Simpson”