“Where do babies come from? Don't bother asking adults. They lie like pigs. However, diligent independent research and hours of playground consultation have yielded fruitful, if tentative, results. There are several theories. Near as we can figure out, it has something to do with acting ridiculous in the dark. We believe it is similar to dogs when they act peculiar and ride each other. This is called "making love". Careful study of popular song lyrics, advertising catch-lines, TV sitcoms, movies, and T-Shirt inscriptions offers us significant clues as to its nature. Apparently it makes grown-ups insipid and insane. Some graffiti was once observed that said "sex is good". All available evidence, however, points to the contrary.”

“Lisa, I apologize to you, I was wrong, I take it all back. Always be yourself. If you want to be sad, honey, be sad. We’ll ride it out with you. And when you get finished feeling sad, we’ll still be there. From now on, let me do the smiling for both of us.”

“Your lyrics lack subtlety! You can't just have your characters announce how they feel! That makes me feel angry!”

“But we all had an agreement to let each other get away with everything! That's Capitalism!”

“Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.”

“Well, most grown-ups forget what it was like to be a kid. I vowed that I would never forget.”

“The entire world of grown-ups is corrupt and stupid.”