“I’m a screwed-up person who no longerknows how to communicate with the people I love. But I meant everything I told you inmy letter. If I were your Nikki, I would have come back to you on Christmas Day, butI’m not Nikki. I know. And I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry for screwing everything up. I hurt you again, and for that I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t want to do that anymore. So … I’m not going to stayfor the wedding. I’m just going to take off now. I won’t see you again, not for a long time. Probably for the best. Being near you like this, it hurts. AndJere”—Conrad cleared his throat and stepped backward, making space between us—“he’s the one who needs you.”Hoarsely, he said, “I need you to know that no matter what happens, it was worth it to me. Being with you, loving you. It was all worth it”

“I would have done anything. Anything to get back to you. I can’t say I’m sorry for that.”

“You said I told you I was in love with someone else, but I’m not. That’s not what I meant. Cassandra was a part of my past, but our time together ended. The only person I want, the only person I love, is you.”

“This is a bad story.”“Sorry. I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have told you.”“No, you should,” I say.“But—”“I don’t want there to be bad stories and me not know them.”

“I’m sorry for all the secrecy, for making you feel like you weren’t important enough to know the real me. But I’m most sorry because I have fucked you – I don’t know how many times – and never made love to you.”