“By contrast, my method of eating a cupcake was quite straightforward - step one: gobble it down one large bite at a time until there's nothing left. That's it.”

“I had, I'll admit, effected a certain style - a method, if you will - of cupcake eating. To begin, you remove the cupcake liner carefully so as not to unnecessarily crumble the cake, and set it aside. You then turn the cupcake slowly in your hand, taking bites along the line where cake meets icing, your mouth filling with a perfect combination of both components. Once you've come full circle, you gently twist off the bottom half inch of cake, a move that takes considerable finesse and leaves a delicate sliver of cake - the ideal size for lying flat on your tongue and allowing it to slowly dissolve, building anticipation for that final bite. To finish, you are left with the center cylinder of cake and icing, the cupcake's very heart, sometimes filled with a surprising burst of custard or jam or mousse, sometimes not, but always, always, the most moist, flavorful bite of the entire cupcake. Take a breath before diving into that final, perfect bite; it is to be savored for as long as possible. Finally, of course, you scavenge the crumbs from the cupcake liner you set aside during step one, then ball the liner into your fist and overhand it into the nearest receptacle. Make the shot? You get another cupcake.”

“You know," I told him,"if you don't know how to eat a cupcake, that's nothing to be ashamed of."Now he did smile. "I know how to eat a cupcake.""Sure you do.""I do," he said. "I just don't want one of those.""Yeah? Prove it.”

“You can transform yourself entirely: One bite at a time, One step at a time, One day at a time!”

“Don't allow guilt to enter your heart, because it's a disease, like cancer, that'll eat away at you until there's nothing left.”

“Me is the only one what won't be gobbled up because giants is never eating giants”