“i could never be a sports writer, unless my assignment was to write 'sports sports sports sports sports' for three pages”
“Writing is a team sport.”
“Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.”
“Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game.”
“Ich hasste Sport. Ich hasste Sport, und ich hasste Sportler, und ich hasste Leute, die sich Sport ansahen, und ich hasste Leute, die Leute, die sich Sport ansahen, nicht hassten.”
“People always ask me if I’m into sports, and I say, “Well, isn’t writing a sport? If you’re doing it right, and you have a deadline, you should be sweating.”