“Don't talk to strangers. Don't do drugs. Don't smoke. Don't drink and drive. Don't have sex. Wear a condom. Wear sunblock. Wear a seat belt. Wear a helmet. If you see something, say something. Just say no. Stop, drop, and roll. Stop, look, and listen. Look both ways before you cross the street...Safety is an illusion. Bad things can happen to anyone at any time, whether you follow the rules or not. You can check left, check right, check left again before you step off the curb and into the crosswalk, but that won't stop an anonymous asshole in his shitty pickup from putting you in intensive care...”

“Or just don't wear it. Then you can check off the skinny-dipping and kill two birds.''I'm not surfing naked, Asher.''Rats,' he said.”

“It's weird going to school with rich people. On the surface, you're jealous. You want to be like them, you want to have the things they have, wear the clothes they wear, and drive the cars they drive. But somewhere in the back of your head, you realize that you don't want to be the one everybody looks at and says to themselves, "I can't stand that fucker." So you're left wanting to be just like them and hating every bone in their bodies at the same time.”

“little life lesson 23: before making a snide comment about someone else's outfit, check to see if you're wearing knee boots with fringe. if you answer yes, drop it. just do.”

“Look, girls don't care how many push-ups you can do. They just want to get high and wear flowers in their hair. Maybe steal a car.”

“but I don't want to wear a condom because I don't feel anything," and she says calmly... glaring at me,"If you don't use one you're not going to feel anything anyway.”