“There will be no 'one day,'" I yell. "Because holidays are over, Griggs, and you and I are never going to cross paths again. Not in the next ten days. Not ever! Have a fantastic life.[...]"Be careful what you wish for," he says with quiet menace, "because I'm about this close to telling you to get the fuck out of my life."I stare at him."What do you want from me?" he asks.What I want from every person in my life, I want to tell him.More.”

“What do you want from me?" he asks.What I want from every person in my life, I want to tell him.More.”

“The head nerd of the Cadets is my partner and when it's over he asks me for my number. I'm very flattered and he looks a bit crestfallen when I say no."It's because they don't have coverage out here," Griggs tells him."No," I say, looking up at Griggs. "It's actually because my heart belongs to someone else." And if I could bottle the look on his face, I'd keep it by my bedside for the rest of my life.”

“He is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen and it's not about his face, but the life force I can see in him. It's the smile and the pure promise of everything he has to offer. Like he's saying, 'Here I am world, are you ready for so much passion and beauty and goodness and love and every other word that should be in the dictionary under the word life?' Except this boy is dead, and the unnaturalness of it makes me want to pull my hair out with Tate and Narnie and Fitz and Jude's grief all combined. It makes me want to yell at the God that I wish I didn't believe in. For hogging him all to himself. I want to say, 'You greedy God. Give him back. I needed him here.”

“But then I catch Grigg's eye and he looks at me in a way that tells me exactly what he's feeling and I love that look. Suddenly I want to yell out to everyone, "It's a game, these territory wars. They loved eachother.”

“I just stare at him. I want to ask him a thousand questions, but I can tell he doesn't want to be asked. "We make weird friends," I say instead."I've never been into the f-word with people.""I'm privileged, then? Why me?"He thinks for a moment and shrugs again."You're the realest person I've ever known.""Is that good or bad?""It's fucking awful. There's not much room for bullshit, and you know how I thrive on it."We laugh for a moment and begin walking again.”

“You seem to have a problem with me," he says in typical Griggs fashion.I can tell he regrets saying it when he is treated to one of Hannah's long cold gazes."I think it will be a while before I forgive the trip to Sydney," she says flatly."Fair enough. I think it will be a while before I forgive you for what you put her through over the past six weeks."I watch them both and for the first time it occurs to me that I'm no longer flying solo and that I have no intention of pretending that I am. I have an aunt and I have a Griggs and this is what it's like to have connections with people."Do you know what?" I ask both of them. "If you don't build a bridge and get over it, I'll never forgive either of you.”