“If you are spending more time matching your Kitchenaid to your kettle to your cupboards than you are cooking, something is very wrong.”

“What are you gonna help us with? That very tiny used condom?”

“Cause it's nine in the afternoon and Your eyes are the size of the moon You could 'cause you can so you do We're feeling so good Just the way that we do When it's nine in the Afternoon”

“Raindrops on roses and girls in white dresses and sleeping with roaches and taking best guesses and shade of the sheets and before all the stains and a few more of your least favorite things...”

“Not called!' did you say?'Not heard the call,' I think you should say.Put your ear down to the Bible, and hear Him bid you go and pull sinners out of the fire of sin. Put your ear down to the burdened, agonized heart of humanity, and listen to its pitiful wail for help. Go stand by the gates of hell, and hear the damned entreat you to go to their father's house and bid their brothers and sisters and servants and masters not to come there. Then look Christ in the face — whose mercy you have professed to obey — and tell Him whether you will join heart and soul and body and circumstances in the march to publish His mercy to the world.”

“Your pops is a real playa”

“Catholicism - all the perversions of Christianity - is not a faith of love. It is a faith of fear. Obey, be good, toe the line, and heaven is yours, the first prize in the lottery of eternity. Disobey, react, cut the lifeline, and never-ceasing damnation is the booby prize. The dogma is, love the only god and you shall be safe. Fail in that love and he will not rescue you, not until you crawl and apologize and fawn before the altar. What kind of a religion demands such indignity?”