“Noah acted like he felt nothing because he felt everything. He seemed not to care because he cared too much.”

“He didn't look like the same person who picked me up this morning. Noah--sarcastic, distant, untouchable Noah--cared. And that made him real.”

“I want YOU to be the one wanting me first. Pushing me first. Kissing me first. Don't be careful with me," he said. "Because I won't be careful with you.”

“So." Noah said carefully. I was sitting up cross-legged and tangled in my sheets."So." I said back"Would you like to hear about Curious George's new adventures?"I shook my head."Are you sure?" Noah asked. "He's been such a naughty monkey.""Pass.”

“You like me,” he finally said. “You like me, like me.” He was trying not to smile.“No. I hate you,” I said, hoping that saying it would make it so.“And yet, you draw me.” Noah was still smug, completely undeterred by my declaration.This was torture; worse somehow than what just happened, even though it was only the two of us. Or because it was only the two of us.“Why?” he asked.“Why what?” What could I say? Noah, despite you being an asshole, or maybe because of it, I’d like to rip off your clothes and have your babies. Don’t tell.”

“In my rush, I hadn’t tied my shoelaces. Noah was now tying them for me. He looked up at me through his dark fringe of lashes and smiled. The expression on his face melted me completely. I knew I had the goofiest grin plastered on my lips, and didn’t care. “There,” he said as he finished tying the laces on my left shoe. “Now you won’t fall.”Too late.”

“Fix me," I commanded him. "This thing, what I've done - there's something wrong with me, Noah. Fix it."Noah's expression broke my heart as he brushed my hair from my face, and skimmed the line of my neck. "I can't""Why not?" I asked, my voice threatening to crack."Because," he said, "You're not broken.”