“Many a calm river begins as a turbulent waterfall, yet none hurtles and foams all the way to the sea.”

“Can it be, thought I, that my sole mission on earth is to destroy the hopes of others? Ever since I began to live and act, fate has somehow associated me with the last act of other people's tragedies, as if without me no one could either die or give way to despair! I have been the inevitable character who comes in at the final act, involuntarily playing the detestable role of the hangman or the traitor. What has been fate's object in all this? Has it destined me to be the author of middle-class tragedies and family romances--or a purveyor of tales for, say, the Reader's Library? Who knows? Are there not many who begin life by aspiring to end it like Alexander the Great, or Lord Byron, and yet remain petty civil servants all their lives?”

“No, I'm not Byron, it's my roleTo be an undiscovered wonder,Like him, a persecuted wand'rer,But furnished with a Russian soul.I started sooner, sooner ending,My mind will never reach so high;Within my soul, beyond the mending,My shattered aspirations lie:Dark ocean answer me, can anyPlumb all your depth with skillful trawl?Who will explain me to the many?I... perhaps God? No one at all?”

“I was modest--they accused me of being crafty: I became secretive. I felt deeply good and evil--nobody caressed me, everybody offended me: I became rancorous. I was gloomy--other children were merry and talkative. I felt myself superior to them--but was considered inferior: I became envious. I was ready to love the whole world--none understood me: and I learned to hate.”

“What of it? If I die, I die. It will be no great loss to the world, and I am thoroughly bored with life. I am like a man yawning at a ball; the only reason he does not go home to bed is that his carriage has not arrived yet.”

“I love enemies, though not in the Christian way. They amuse me, excite my blood. Being always on one’s guard, catching every glance, the significance of every word, guessing at intentions, frustrating their plots, pretending to be tricked, and suddenly, with a shove, upturning the whole enormous and arduously built edifice of their cunning and schemes—that’s what I call life.”

“I know a rock in a highland's ravine,On which only eagles might ever be seen,But a black wooden cross o'er a precipice reigns,It rots and it ages from tempests and rains.And many years have gone without any hints,From times when it was seen from faraway hills.And its every arm is raised up to the sky,As if catching clouds or going to fly.Oh, if I were able to rise there and stay,Then how I'd cry there and how I'd pray;And then I would throw off real life's chainsAnd live as a brother of tempests and rains!”