“Wow! First vampires. Then gods. Now…vampire—gods? What’s next? Werewolves? Smurfs? Were-Smurfs?”

“I’ve been Obeahed by an Obeahman? Is this like how the Smurfs say they smurfing smurfed all the time?”

“I want to save the environment. I like being green as much as the next Smurf.”

“A monster. I despise my true form. (Acheron)I can’t imagine why. Other than killing me, you were actually cute in a very Papa Smurf kind of way. (Tory)Papa Smurf? I don’t look like Papa Smurf. (Acheron)No, baby, you don’t at all. You look like sex on a stick. Now is your ego all better? (Tory)”

“Lend's dad, two werewolves, and a vampire. It was like the setup to a bad joke or something. A doctor, two werewolves, and a vampire walk into a bar. "What'll you have?" the bartender asks. "We were thinking him," the vampire answers, eyeing the doctor. Okay, jokes weren't my strong point.”

“Vampires were myths, childhood stories– as were werewolves, mermaids and dragons. I believed none of it.”