“Note to self: Try to stop reacting to surprises like a cartoon character.”Jane Jameson”

“Jane Jameson."He grinned. "Like the porn star."I gaped at him. "What? No, Jane Jameson.""Oh, not as fun," he said, making disappointed clucking noises.”

“Can we get a whiteboard,like on Law and Order?" Andrea asked.Dick nodded. "I was thinking official 'Keep Jane from Being Murdered Task Force' T-shirts.”

“If looks could kill...well, Dick was already dead, so nothing would happen. But Gabriel was not laughing."See Dick," Dick said, pointing at his chest. He then swept his hand dangerously close to mind. "Jane. Dick and Jane. Come on, you humorless jackass. That's funny.”

“You are the night.""I am the night," I repeated."You are the night."I cocked my head, sending him a questioning look. "I am the night?""Jane!""Why is it that when you say my name, it sounds like a curse word?”

“Some vampires wouldn't react if you shoved a rosary down their pants, though I wouldn't recommend testing the theory.”

“Aunt Jettie: "yes, i'm wandering the earth seeking revenge on ben & jerry for giving me the fat a$$ and coronary & I give out love advice to the tragically lonely."jane: "Is that an ironic eternal punishment for the lady who died an eighty-one year old spinster." jettie: "single by choice you twirp."jane: "banshee."jettie: "bloodsucker.”