“I kissed his forehead. “You don’t have to thank me. I told you, I do anything for someone I care about.”He pulled away and looked up at me. “You said you do anything for someone you love.”I didn’t know how to respond to that. We were in such a precarious place. I didn’t want to say anything that might scare him away or let him know how I truly felt, because at the end of the day, I loved him. It was that simple. Instead I gave him a small smile. “I did say that, didn’t I?”
“From Chloe's Secret--coming soon“What are you saying?”“I’m saying I want to have a relationship with you. I want to love you.”“Is there a ‘but’ coming next?”“But the funny thing is, when I didn’t want to love you—it happened anyway.”He slipped his arms into my back pockets and hugged the breath out of me. I choked, my eyes stung. “I don’t know what to say.”He smiled. “Say whatever you want to. Just because I said it, you don’t have to.”He was right; I didn’t have to. He wasn’t asking anything of me.”
“I spun away from him. I didn’t need his pity.I started walking in the opposite direction of the house. I didn’t know where I was going, I just wanted to get away from him.He called out, “I still love you.”I froze. And then slowly, I turned around to look at him. “Don’t say that”
“I’m going to go," he said."All right."He didn’t move. Then: "I don’t want to.""Do it anyway."He chuckled. "You’re a hard woman, Faith Devlin.""Hardy.""I didn’t know him. He isn’t real to me. Did you love him?""Yes." But not the way I love you. Never like that.”
“Connor,” I murmured, not sure what to say to him. We were crossing into dangerous territory, and we both knew it.“I don’t think you understand how much I count on you, Abby, how much I need you, and how much I care about our friendship. You’re so important to me.”I didn’t have an opportunity to respond. Before I knew what was happening, he was kissing me, and I was kissing him back, and it was everything I’d imagined it would be when I envisioned us kissing a thousand times.”
“Siva,” I said and my heart broke for this beautiful man. “You once told me that love is hard, painful, and anything but pleasant.” I laughed, “I feel that with you, Siva. I love you so much it hurts. I didn’t have that with Dev. I loved him, of course, but now… When I look back on our relationship I realize that we were more like best friends. He didn’t make my heart speed up like this,” I said and placed Siva’s hand over my heart. “He didn’t make my toes curl with a look, he didn’t make me love him and hate him at the same time, and he didn’t leave me breathless. I love you. I’m in love with you. You’re the one I want. You’re the one I choose. You are not second best, Siva, do you hear me? You’re not. Even if… even if Dev hadn’t died I still think we would’ve found each other. You’re my heart and my soul Siva. I fell for you Siva and I fell hard and I’m okay if I never get up.”